Audra Krell

On Purpose

Crying in My Cruffins

Photo courtesy @Istockphoto

I emotionally “hung in there” until he walked thru the door with two chocolate chip pumpkin cookies. If you know me at all, you know I’m crazy for everything pumpkin. This blog should be called Pumpkin Lover’s Anonymous. But then it wouldn’t be anonymous I guess. Anyway. . .

Yesterday was Keegan’s last day at work; as he left for his sophomore year of college today. His boss brought in food to celebrate a great summer and to wish him well at school. So he stole TWO cookies, just for me. What 19-year-old does that? Keegan, that’s who. I ate my cruffins (cross between a cookie and a muffin) and choked back a flood of tears.

It’s moments like these that literally bring me to my knees. All the thoughtful consideration, the respect and love symbolized in two little nuggets of pumpkiny goodness. I’m so thankful and grateful to God for all that Keegan is. And being honest, I really don’t want anything to change.

I’m reminded though, of the words of the great British theologian John Henry Newman.

“To live is to change and to be perfect is to have changed often.”

I believe that Newman means “to have lived well” when he writes of being perfect in this sentence. As a recovering perfectionist, any chance to legally be perfect is one I’ll always attempt.

So in the spirit of a new school year, new dreams and the possibility of the ever elusive perfection, I’ll throw my arms around change.  Which brings us to our final quote from an unknown author.

“If nothing ever changed, there’d be no butterflies.”

 I wish you cruffins, butterflies and every blessing as you all begin again.

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11 thoughts on “Crying in My Cruffins

  1. What a blessing to “begin again.” And what an amazing gift of your sons from our Father! I so appreciate the small things like that; two cookies from a loved one… I guess it doesn’t get any better than that…

    Wonderful post, what stories your heart has to tell…

  2. Love it. Love it all. Especially the fact that I love pumpkin, too. Because life does revolve around me. 🙂 However, in deference to the idea of mourning with those who mourn, I think taking a day off of changing, and crying in your cruffins is exactly what the Great Physician would order. Hugs.

  3. Gretchen, I was waiting for you, my editor friend, to beg the question, where does the “r” come from in Cruffins? Cookies nor muffins don’t have an r. Maybe you just didn’t want to make me cry more. Truth is, I have no idea, I just like cruffins better than cuffins. Especially with beautiful alliteration like crying in my cruffins! : )

    • I actually did wonder, but decided to let it go. See? The 40s and grace are a beautiful thing. LOL. How are you feeling today?

      • And another thing…I used “their” when I should’ve used “there”, so I’d need to pull the plank out. 🙂

      • We went to Tucson on Saturday and saw him and got him settled in his new house. I LOVE his roommates and his house is wonderful and I’m just so happy for him that I can’t feel anything but good. I do miss him though.

  4. How beautiful! My son is marrying next week — I can relate! Timely… as it should be… wouldn’t have it any other way… but still bittersweet. Blessings to you both on this journey. 🙂 or 😦

  5. Bittersweet is the perfect word! Every blessing to you and your son as he starts again!

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