Audra Krell

On Purpose

Archive for the tag “respect”

Nobody Kicks our Can

The whine of the garbage truck squealed  for too long in front of our house. I had overfilled the large receptacle and walked to the window with dread. Sure enough, the driver was out of the truck, picking up trash. Just as I went to help him, he reared back and kicked the can five feet.

“He just kicked the can down the street,” I yelled to our 14 -year -old son as I hurried to find my shoes so I could outside to have a word with him. At the very least I was going to call his superiors to complain; nobody kicks our can.

By the time I got to the end of the driveway though, the can sat upright and the trash truck was gone. I picked up the remaining trash and turned to go inside. 

I was met by our huffing 6', 215 pound seventeen -year -old. When our middle boy saw me go outside, he went to rally his brothers.

“Where is he?” 

“He’s gone honey, but he picked up the can,” I said.

“I’m going to find him, you don’t do that,” he said while looking up and down the street.

“It’s okay, let’s just let it go.”

It was like talking down a prize- fighter facing his biggest opponent, but somehow I convinced him to go inside.

As we walked back, I was struck by the protective hearts boys have. I am so used to defending them, protecting and softening the blow, that I didn’t even question charging outside to confront a visibly angry man. 

In Ephesians 5:25, God commands husbands to love their wives. A big part of loving is protecting. I realized my boys are not going to kick into protection mode the day they are married. It is up to me to allow them to be the protector; to respect the way God has wired them to treat all women. 

When they are young, we encourage imaginary play that allows them to be the hero. As they grow and playing pretend isn’t as acceptable, opportunities to singlehandedly save the world are put away with childish things. 

Our boys are 17, 14 and 12. The need to be the hero in a world where there aren’t many, is more critical than ever. The acknowledgement of their warrior hearts and the way God has wired them is validating, freeing and respectful to a young man.

The “angry trash man” was an opportunity to let the boys defend and protect. I have to proactively look for situations where the boys can be heroes.  Then someday, they'll  be heroes to their wife and children.

 

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Have You Met Mason?

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He is our middle boy, just finished 8th grade yesterday and today started playing basketball at the high school. This is him trying on his new suit, which he is wearing on our cruise this week. In his end of year papers, I stumbled on a little booklet that some of his classmates had made about him, and I find it completely hilarious! 

Note these are from 13-14 year olds and I have not corrected them:

Though I don't know him well, Mason is a good student body president.

Mason is very rude, but he is nice to his friends.

Although Mason is witty and smart, he is very funny and has a great smile.

Because Mason is athletic, he is good at sports.

Mason seems nice, and he's funny.

Mason you are one of the most athletic and inteligent people I know.

Mason is cool because he calls Dylan fat with a Ph.

Even though I don't know Mason very well, I hear he is a good athlete.

Even though Mason can be annoying, he has a great sense of humor despite this annoyingness.

I had a great time this year with Mason this year and I will miss his humor.

Mason is a funny boy, he seems really nice.

When Mason plays basketball he wins.

Although I don't have many classes with Mason, I know he is a very smart young mem/boy.

Playing on the same team as him, he is an outstanding athelete.

And my very favorite:

Because Mason has aspirations, I do not dislike him much.

My takeaway: Always be his friend and on Mason's team, if you want to be cool spell fat with a Ph, and if you want to be a successful and liked young MEM, have aspirations. Sounds easy enough.

We're so proud of you Mason, off to high school!

What I Feel

So much thought centers not on feelings, but on choice actions. For example, even when we don't "feel" like it, we are to respect others, love unconditionally,etc. I know if we wait for feelings to always be there, we won't do much.

Today however, I was encouraged by the way I feel. 

The past three months have taught me about things in the medical field. I've learned about lots that I wish I had never heard of. Wry neck, Post Traumatic Memory Loss, Post Concussive Syndrome, the difference between a Neuroradiologist and a Neurologist and that CT stands for computed tomography, not cat. 

So in short, I feel like a Doctor. 

Okay, that's not what I feel like, a nurse maybe, but I digress. Even after not performing the actions that others define as strong, I realize that being strong isn't about what I do, but about how I feel. 

Through the past three months, God has made me feel strong. 

And deeply humbled and grateful.

Regift This

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According to Dictionary.com, regifting is "to give as a gift, something one previously received as a gift."

On the radio the other day, someone said regift is a dirty word. Regifting often has a negative connotation to it or even a humorous one if there is a white elephant in the room. This season, I am regifting my thoughts. The following are Holiday survival tips I've received in the past, and I'm passing on the best of the best to you. 

Don't say I never re-gave you anything!

Respect that the Holidays are difficult for others. What is supposed to be the happiest time of the year is the worst for some. Unfulfilled childhood dreams of Christmas past, missing a loved one and the economic pressures of gift giving can wreak havoc on the best of us. A simple smile of appreciation for the weary store clerk on Black Friday goes a long way.


Employers, consider giving more than a paycheck this year. Gym memberships, Fruit of the Month Clubs, Coffee gift cards or special music lets your people know you value them as individuals.


Give of yourself. The best gift is your heart, not your stuff. Appreciate others for their heart, not for their stuff.


Intentionally affirm others. Devise a plan to make someone feel extra special this Holiday season. How about a "12 days of Christmas" with gifts of your time and talent poured out on your loved ones? What about a Chanukah or Kwanzaa season spent cooking together and simply enjoying each other?


Finish your shopping/baking/making early. Nothing screams stress like running through the corner gas station on Thanksgiving Day, praying this is the year they're carrying fresh Turkeys.


Take it easy in between and after the Holidays. Be gentle with yourself and don't apologize for it. If you can't do something, be honest, be authentic, but above all be true to yourself. Nobody wants your regift of stress. 


Now your happy relaxed self, we'll take every time. 


You never know, we might even give it away next year.


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